The past few days have been tolerable. I don't feel like I am going to die at any given moment, I can be trusted for short periods of time in a grocery store, I don't wail and thrash about when I realize what my breakfast, lunch or dinner will consist of. I do however have an ever present yearning for what I can't eat.
And I am never really full, there is salad full and then there is carbohydrate full. Salad full is when green foam will come out of your nose if you try to jam one more shred of lettuce in your mouth but carbohydrate full is a nice warm heaviness in your stomach. The difference is huge.
A sample meal:
You will need a bowl, if you don't have anything larger than a cereal or soup bowl look around for a punch bowl or bird bath. Chop lettuce until your arm grows tired. Toss with apple cider vinegar and wave a piece of poached chicken over the top.
Bon appetit!
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ReplyDeleteSalad full: I feel virtuous. I am brimming with virtue. I am a good person. Why don't I look thinner yet after doing such a virtuous thing? Why eat salad if you aren't going to be sainted and made thinner immediately? Grrrrr.
ReplyDeleteCarbohydrate full: Mmmm. Mmmmmm. Life is soooo good and nice and yummy and mmmmm-mmmm. And even if life isn't good, who cares, because mmmm-mmm-mmmm-mmm. Oh dear, I'm bad. I don't deserve for my life to be good. Ugh. I feel sick.
This made me laugh so hard I almost peed my pants.
ReplyDelete